“Help Me Find It”

“Mom, what will I do after Bible School? I really don’t want to be feeding calves forever. There’s got to be more to life than that!”

“Here you go again,  worrying about not having enough to do. You said the same thing after school was out. Were you bored? No! You wondered what you would do after you got back from New York. Well,you were busy in the fields driving tractor and now you are wondering what you will do after Bible School? If God has provided enough work to keep you busy all the times you were wondering what you’d do next , don’t you think He’s got something planned for you after  Bible School? ”

“Yeah,  you’re right. I guess I will just have to wait and see what the future brings.” I smile.  A feeling of peace and excitement settle over me! It’s one thing to know and believe that God has my future planned ,but it’s another to hear it restated by someone else ; In this case, my wonderful mother!

I  don’t have a clue what I will be doing in the middle of February . Will I still be feeding calves? Possibly.  Will I be planning a trip to Nicaragua ? Now that would be cool! It’s the not knowing that makes the future exciting . Where will God have me by then? What will He have me doing? I am excited to see what His plan is. Sometimes, like the time  I just wrote about,  I would like to know what the next step is or what the big picture looks like , but if I would know, would I be as excited?

I’ll be 18 by then. Well, barely since my birthday is only on the 22nd of February.  Eighteen! That’s the age when I get my  own phone bills ,  a new  picture taken for my license, a passport because I don’t have one yet , and last but not least, the door to foreign countries and mission work has just swung open  a little further. Now if God gives me the okay and allows me to pass through that door ,when the time comes, I shall be ready!     I’m getting ahead of myself. Setting foot on foreign soil is one of my dreams. You know that.  As far as all the bills and decisions (some difficult ,others easy and fun) , that’s all part of growing up; not a dream.

Do I know what God wants me to do? Do I know which road to take at the crossroads? No I don’t ,but I’m not left clueless. God has given me His Word and is just a prayer away .He  will reveal His plan for my life as well as yours , ONE DAY AT A TIME!

Following is a song that I recently heard and  I love the words because they are my prayer.


          "Help Me Find It"
I don't know where to go from here.
It all used to seem so clear.
I'm finding I can't do this on my own.

I don't know where to go from here
As long as I know that You are near.
          I'm done fighting;
          I'm finally letting go. 

     I will trust in You.
   You've never failed before.
     I will trust in You. 
   If there's a road I should walk
           Help me find it.
          If I need to be still
       Give me peace for the moment.
           Whatever Your will.
           Whatever Your will .
       Can you help me find it?
       Can You help me find it? 

I'm giving You fear and You give faith.
           I'm giving You doubt
           You give me grace.
     For every step I've never been alone. 

 Even when it hurts, You'll have Your way.
      Even in the valley I will say
           With every breath
    "You've never let me go." 

        I will wait for You
       You've never failed before 
        I will wait for You. 


I will lift my empty hands( come fill me up again)
Have Your way my King ( I give my all to You)
I lift my eyes again ( Was blind but now I see)
          'Cause You are all I need!
~Sidewalk Prophets~     







4 thoughts on ““Help Me Find It”

  1. My smile is big as I read this. I love your love for life and your giving God the pen to write the next chapter in the story of your life. (And I pray that I can be as good a mom as you have when my children reach these teenage years.)


    • Thanks for the comment and encouragement,Lori! You are a great mom and I’m positive you still will be in 4 years when Kate is 17! From what I heard, it’s not easy to be a mother of a teenager(s). Ask mom if you have questions ;)! (She didn’t just see me write that 😉 )


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